Time to be a little bit selfish...

I know it's Menu Monday today, but I didn't cook anything, really - we had dinner at friends' tonight and lunch was...not spectacular - AND I don't have anything pre-planned to post (whoops), so this week, you'll just have to get over it.  hahaha In fact, if you are so inclined, leave ME one of your favourite recipes to try out in the comments - I'm always looking for new, yummy things to eat!  You know, as long as they're not super weird...

No, today, in lieu of food, let's talk about me.

(image from: http://teachmelife.wordpress.com/2012/03/07/teach-me-not-to-be-selfish/)

You know, the me that you are.  And that I am. And that guy is.  You know. Me.

Here's the thing.

I am a mom. And a wife. And a daughter, sister, student, friend, daughter-and-sister-in-law and auntie.  A role model, teacher, (very small) business owner, housekeeper, pet owner, church-goer, music director and blogger.

But really. How can I expect of myself to do BE any of those things with any degree of success if I'm not, also, ME.  If I'm not someone who looks after herself, loves herself, and works on herself. Because I am NOT perfect, and do need work. 

Lots of it.

Think about it - when are you your best me.  What things do you do that make you just....aaaaaahhhhhh..... FABulous.  Reading a favourite book? Playing video games? Going for a run? A bike ride? Crafting? Cooking? Driving?

I am my best me when I make SURE to take time for me. When I say "SCREW IT!" to my housework, homework, whining family (not that my 4-year-old EVER whines 'cause I'm such an awesome mom she knows NOT to.... hahahahahaha yeah right.... Oh, man, that would be awesome!), and take the evening to go to a kickboxing class. To participate in a musical presentation, and rehearse rehearse rehearse rehearse ahead of time.  You know what? Sometimes, to lay my lazy butt down on the couch and watch some silly chick t.v. (Have you discovered Drop Dead Diva yet? I LOVE it. Netflix, I need more!)  I read books.  I occasionally craft something - I love the finished product; it makes all the work totally worth it to see something awesome and say, HOT DIGGITY I made that.

So, am I a horrid person? Selfish?  I don't know. Maybe some days.  Maybe the days where I spent a good chunk of YESTERDAY on the couch buried in a book and do the same thing today. That's not really ideal. 

But it's about balance, right?

So much easier said than done.

But you HAVE to do it. You HAVE to.  Seriously.

Think about it.  How are YOU your best self? What do you have to do for YOU to be me.  Think about people you like to be around - are they happy people, who are pretty good at being me, or are they....not.  I find lousy me people can really suck you dry - it can be such an effort to be around them a lot because you're almost trying to compensate for their lack of meness or something. I don't know what happens. It's like Eeyore or Tigger: who would you rather invite to a party? You know?

If I'm not my best me, I CAN'T be Mom. A good wife. The world's greatest daughter, sister, an A student, best friend, world class daughter-and-sister-in-law and favourite auntie.  A decent role model, exemplary teacher, successful (very small) business owner, capable housekeeper, loving pet owner, avid church-goer, talented music director and blogger extraordinaire.  I cannot. 

And frankly, when I'm NOT being me, when I'm not taking care of myself and I'm depressed, in a funk... no one else likes me either.  Well, obviously not no one - Mommies always love their kids even when they're idiots.  But I'm not a ray of sunshine for anyone to be around when I'm not looking after myself.  And it's indicated by my interactions, or incredible lack thereof, with people around me.  When I'm ME I'm..."popular" for lack of a better, non-high-school-term.  When I'm lost?  I'm alone. I'm a mess. I withdraw from people and they're not overly disappointed to see me go.  I'm not missed or wished for because I'm so difficult to be around. I lose potential for friendships and have rock relationships with the most important people in my life.  Little Miss gets antsy with me because I'm such a crap mom.

So yes, I'm ALL for putting others first and doing for others and service.... ask my family; they accuse me regularly of being a "people-pleaser," and I have a heck of a time saying NO - I don't like confrontation and never want to step on toes.  Don't get me wrong, I really am a huge advocate for service.

But gosh darn it, if I'm not taking care of me, myself, and I then what the heck good am I going to be TO serve anyone else?

So...go look after you, okay?  Stop making excuses.  Bob Harper tweeted this morning: "Your challenge this week is to not make any excuses! Live in the present, not on yesterday or tomorrow!"  So STOP telling yourself you're too busy, that you'll start exercising TOMORROW, or at the end of the week, or as soon as that project is over.... you are WORTH it. You DESERVE to start now. You HAVE to look after yourself, I promise you.  You will be happier and everyone you're sacrificing your me for will be happier with and for you.

And that is the end of my soapboxing for tonight.  Now where's my book...