2012 was a pretty crappy year in the Red+ household, frankly. I mean, some awesome things happened, but it was a tough year. Just lots of....crap. hahaha And while dealing via writing helps me a lot sometimes, I just couldn't be bothered to take the time. Spent my me-time kickboxing, reading, and playing with my friends.
You MAY have heard, probably most people who would bother to read my blog, that in 2012 I FINALLY got pregnant. FIN.AL.LY. My gosh. FINALLY when inappropriate, nosy people asked about our procreation plans we had good news. For those we felt like telling, anyway. O:-)
I count it amongst my greatest blessings that thus far in my life I have been pregnant twice and had no 'serious' problems or complications. I haven't had the horrible misfortune of miscarrying early on, and while this baby still gestates the computer is bouncing around in my lap with kicks and punches, so with less than a month to go 'til Number Two's debut all appears to be fabulous and healthy with both myself and the fetus. Which. Is. AWESOME.
After waiting so long for this baby please know I DO NOT take this for granted.
Anyway.
You may have seen (and voted about me blogging! hahaha) on Facebook that I have a bee in my bonnet. I'm sure it won't surprise anyone who knows me at ALL to know the bee is baby-related, and YES, has to do with people who continue to prove my theories about the ever-increasing stupidity of humanity.
So. Here it goes.
What is the FIRST thing that someone asks when she finds out you are, or anyone else is, pregnant?
WHY is that the first thing people ask?!?! WHY?! WHY WHY WHY?! Why does it MATTER?! Seriously?! Does it really MATTER if someone is expecting a girl or a boy? Is our society still so unevolved that you would PREFER for someone ELSE to increase the boy vs. girl or girl vs. boy numbers by contributing offspring to one or the other sex? Is it BETTER to have a girl or a boy? Is a boy less worthy of celebration or a girl more worth shopping for because you HAVE to dress her in pink and lace?
Can we not just be thrilled that, assuming everything goes okay, the family is expanding at all?
Yes. WE, the PARENTS like to find out. We like to know what our medical professionals think the baby is after the ultrasound. It helps us wrap our heads around the fact that I'm NOT just getting ginormously huge for no reason, and to connect a little bit with the idea of another being showing up in our lives. But neither Mr. Man or I CARED that Little Miss was expected to be a girl, nor do we CARE about the sex of this baby. Quite frankly, we're both hoping that the ultrasound tech made a mistake and we'll end up with what we're NOT expecting, just to spite all the what-are-you-having-ers. Or a hermaphrodite. I mean, honestly. It HAPPENS. It's not so uncommon as NOT to happen.
And while I am ALL for gender roles and girls and boys being different - we ARE different, and I believe VERY strongly that our differences are God-given gifts and/or assignments in life - I DO NOT, nor can I ever imagine myself agreeing with the mindset that forces girls into pink and pearls from BIRTH and boys trucks and sports. WHY just because their genitalia are different should they be denied opportunities to pick favourite colours or toys or activities? I even saw one "friend" on facebook post that she had to quickly CORRECT her daughter, who preferred playing with her brother's hockey stick than with her barbies. WHAT. THE. CRAP.
Little Miss has been a fabulous introduction for us into raising a daughter. We love her unbelievably. And we're not the only parents to feel this way about our kids - we KNOW we're uber biased, but gosh darn it, I LOVE being her mom. She is just an absolute delight.
And you know what? She is HER. SHE likes pink, glitter, making jewellery, crafts, colouring, writing "stories" and reading books. She likes Batman, Lego, video games, Mouse Trap, martial arts. She loves princess movies and Barbie movies and Transformers and Power Rangers. She LOVES animals. She wants to be a zookeeper when she grows up. She loves her stuffies and Little Pet Shops to all be in little families of Mommies & babies - any toy she has one species of is an incomplete set until she can pair it up with a mom or babe. She loves computers. She loves cooking. She loves climbing, swinging, sliding. She plays imagination. She wears dresses and skirts and dresses up as Batman for Hallowe'en. She loves sword fighting. She loves doing manicures and pedicures.
So, yeah. If this baby is another girl, we're kind of stoked about that because our last experience has been amazing. Little Miss is just...HER! And if this baby is a little boy? I'm super stoked about THAT because it's a new challenge - diapering around extra bits? What? But he will have the same choices and opportunities that Little Miss has had - if he wants to sing and dance and play with dolls, you'd better believe that's what he's going to do.
Even "knowing" what we're expecting, there's a fairly high chance that these most educated of medical personnel are mistaken and we MIGHT have a baby of the opposite sex. So no, we don't KNOW what we're having. Except that we assume at this point, with everything pointing to awesome, that we ARE having a baby. A wee teeny tiny bitty human being.
And because we seem to be oddities in our feelings about gender-stereotyping BABIES, we have decided, twice now, that while we know what we're EXPECTING to have, we don't share that information with very many people. Because, really. WHAT in the heck does it matter? And no, I won't be ONLY using blue or ONLY using pink for whichever my new offspring turns out to be.
So...what set me off specifically today??
Well, we've told SOME people. Not too many. Only people we know who love us and regardless of whether or not they understand our opinions love us enough to smile and laugh and respect our opinions, and keep the information to themselves.
And yet, the gossipmongers are working their magic. I hate them. I HATE them.
The anticipated gender of my baby is NOT your news. It never has been your news. It never WILL be your news. Any and all information concerning the contents (or more often emptiness) of my uterus is not nor will it EVER be anyone's information except for ME and Mr. Man's. You do NOT get an opinion, nor should you get to know unless expressly told by ME or the FATHER.
Ever notice how I did NOT stand up in church and share my "good news" with you meddlesome lot? Yeah, that was on PURPOSE. Because it's NOT YOUR BUSINESS. You don't get to pick and choose what of my life events you find worthy of celebration with me, and I did NOT ask you to care about this.
I am so infuriated with the gossiping and with the assumption that my life is public just because I now happen to be very noticeably pregnant. Half of you didn't even find out I was pregnant until after Christmas, and guess what, folks? Baby's due THIS month.
Anyway. I'm HAPPY for you people who like to broadcast your pregnancies and baby's anticipated sex from the tops of buildings. Really, I am. I have as much say in your doings as you have in mine, so it's not like your "I'm having a boy!" announcements bother me at all. Everyone celebrates and does things differently. I am not RIGHT, this is just how I am. (Though I do believe I'm right in thinking "correcting" a female from hockey is WRONG WRONG WRONG, but then again, I have a degree in gym class so I'm a little biased towards enjoyable physical activities). I'm just infuriated with people who so blatantly disregard my wishes and willfully misunderstand and/or ignore everything that Mr. Man and I want in these regards. Just because you don't comprehend our thinking doesn't mean YOU'RE right, nor does it give you the right to step on our toes or make us feel second-rate or judged.
And I believe it is never ever ever ever ever ever EVER appropriate to spread news about someone that you haven't that person's explicit permission to share, and we definitely have NOT green-lighted ANYONE sharing the sex of the fetus.
And that, dear folks, in a rather large nutshell, is what got me so insanely riled up today. And why I DON'T confide in many of you anything about anything because, frankly, you can't keep it to yourselves. You care more about getting and sharing information in your "good intentions" than you actually care about us. And so I will continue to be tight-lipped about my life, my choices, my decisions, my family, my plans, because instead of listening, caring and appreciating, you judge, mock, and gossip. Goodness, if you can't keep the sex of my baby a secret how could I EVER trust you to keep something actually IMPORTANT and "juicy" to yourselves??
(Obviously "you" above doesn't necessarily mean YOU, specifically....it's one of those general yous to the yous who suck the happy out of things. YOU yous. Grrrr to yous!)
Anyway. Apologies for offences, but, hey yous did it first. ;-) hahaha And a bunch of you asked. Bring on the negative comments - I know I'm a minority in my opinions, but I don't care, and it doesn't make my feelings invalid. Go ahead and judge and tell me what a horribly cynical miscreant I am.
But just so you know, this miscreant is kind of awesome, and you're very probably missing out because you can't be bothered. Your problem, not mine.
...I'll try to write again (maybe something less scathing? hahaha) before 2014. Maybe I'll even tell you about the baby when it's here! 'Cause...you know. That IS pretty exciting!
Cheers, all!
 |
| from: 511-having-a-bayby-cartoon.gif |
Can we not just be thrilled that, assuming everything goes okay, the family is expanding at all?
Yes. WE, the PARENTS like to find out. We like to know what our medical professionals think the baby is after the ultrasound. It helps us wrap our heads around the fact that I'm NOT just getting ginormously huge for no reason, and to connect a little bit with the idea of another being showing up in our lives. But neither Mr. Man or I CARED that Little Miss was expected to be a girl, nor do we CARE about the sex of this baby. Quite frankly, we're both hoping that the ultrasound tech made a mistake and we'll end up with what we're NOT expecting, just to spite all the what-are-you-having-ers. Or a hermaphrodite. I mean, honestly. It HAPPENS. It's not so uncommon as NOT to happen.
And while I am ALL for gender roles and girls and boys being different - we ARE different, and I believe VERY strongly that our differences are God-given gifts and/or assignments in life - I DO NOT, nor can I ever imagine myself agreeing with the mindset that forces girls into pink and pearls from BIRTH and boys trucks and sports. WHY just because their genitalia are different should they be denied opportunities to pick favourite colours or toys or activities? I even saw one "friend" on facebook post that she had to quickly CORRECT her daughter, who preferred playing with her brother's hockey stick than with her barbies. WHAT. THE. CRAP.
Little Miss has been a fabulous introduction for us into raising a daughter. We love her unbelievably. And we're not the only parents to feel this way about our kids - we KNOW we're uber biased, but gosh darn it, I LOVE being her mom. She is just an absolute delight.
And you know what? She is HER. SHE likes pink, glitter, making jewellery, crafts, colouring, writing "stories" and reading books. She likes Batman, Lego, video games, Mouse Trap, martial arts. She loves princess movies and Barbie movies and Transformers and Power Rangers. She LOVES animals. She wants to be a zookeeper when she grows up. She loves her stuffies and Little Pet Shops to all be in little families of Mommies & babies - any toy she has one species of is an incomplete set until she can pair it up with a mom or babe. She loves computers. She loves cooking. She loves climbing, swinging, sliding. She plays imagination. She wears dresses and skirts and dresses up as Batman for Hallowe'en. She loves sword fighting. She loves doing manicures and pedicures.
So, yeah. If this baby is another girl, we're kind of stoked about that because our last experience has been amazing. Little Miss is just...HER! And if this baby is a little boy? I'm super stoked about THAT because it's a new challenge - diapering around extra bits? What? But he will have the same choices and opportunities that Little Miss has had - if he wants to sing and dance and play with dolls, you'd better believe that's what he's going to do.
Even "knowing" what we're expecting, there's a fairly high chance that these most educated of medical personnel are mistaken and we MIGHT have a baby of the opposite sex. So no, we don't KNOW what we're having. Except that we assume at this point, with everything pointing to awesome, that we ARE having a baby. A wee teeny tiny bitty human being.
And because we seem to be oddities in our feelings about gender-stereotyping BABIES, we have decided, twice now, that while we know what we're EXPECTING to have, we don't share that information with very many people. Because, really. WHAT in the heck does it matter? And no, I won't be ONLY using blue or ONLY using pink for whichever my new offspring turns out to be.
So...what set me off specifically today??
Well, we've told SOME people. Not too many. Only people we know who love us and regardless of whether or not they understand our opinions love us enough to smile and laugh and respect our opinions, and keep the information to themselves.
And yet, the gossipmongers are working their magic. I hate them. I HATE them.
The anticipated gender of my baby is NOT your news. It never has been your news. It never WILL be your news. Any and all information concerning the contents (or more often emptiness) of my uterus is not nor will it EVER be anyone's information except for ME and Mr. Man's. You do NOT get an opinion, nor should you get to know unless expressly told by ME or the FATHER.
Ever notice how I did NOT stand up in church and share my "good news" with you meddlesome lot? Yeah, that was on PURPOSE. Because it's NOT YOUR BUSINESS. You don't get to pick and choose what of my life events you find worthy of celebration with me, and I did NOT ask you to care about this.
I am so infuriated with the gossiping and with the assumption that my life is public just because I now happen to be very noticeably pregnant. Half of you didn't even find out I was pregnant until after Christmas, and guess what, folks? Baby's due THIS month.
Anyway. I'm HAPPY for you people who like to broadcast your pregnancies and baby's anticipated sex from the tops of buildings. Really, I am. I have as much say in your doings as you have in mine, so it's not like your "I'm having a boy!" announcements bother me at all. Everyone celebrates and does things differently. I am not RIGHT, this is just how I am. (Though I do believe I'm right in thinking "correcting" a female from hockey is WRONG WRONG WRONG, but then again, I have a degree in gym class so I'm a little biased towards enjoyable physical activities). I'm just infuriated with people who so blatantly disregard my wishes and willfully misunderstand and/or ignore everything that Mr. Man and I want in these regards. Just because you don't comprehend our thinking doesn't mean YOU'RE right, nor does it give you the right to step on our toes or make us feel second-rate or judged.
And I believe it is never ever ever ever ever ever EVER appropriate to spread news about someone that you haven't that person's explicit permission to share, and we definitely have NOT green-lighted ANYONE sharing the sex of the fetus.
And that, dear folks, in a rather large nutshell, is what got me so insanely riled up today. And why I DON'T confide in many of you anything about anything because, frankly, you can't keep it to yourselves. You care more about getting and sharing information in your "good intentions" than you actually care about us. And so I will continue to be tight-lipped about my life, my choices, my decisions, my family, my plans, because instead of listening, caring and appreciating, you judge, mock, and gossip. Goodness, if you can't keep the sex of my baby a secret how could I EVER trust you to keep something actually IMPORTANT and "juicy" to yourselves??
(Obviously "you" above doesn't necessarily mean YOU, specifically....it's one of those general yous to the yous who suck the happy out of things. YOU yous. Grrrr to yous!)
Anyway. Apologies for offences, but, hey yous did it first. ;-) hahaha And a bunch of you asked. Bring on the negative comments - I know I'm a minority in my opinions, but I don't care, and it doesn't make my feelings invalid. Go ahead and judge and tell me what a horribly cynical miscreant I am.
But just so you know, this miscreant is kind of awesome, and you're very probably missing out because you can't be bothered. Your problem, not mine.
...I'll try to write again (maybe something less scathing? hahaha) before 2014. Maybe I'll even tell you about the baby when it's here! 'Cause...you know. That IS pretty exciting!
Cheers, all!
0 comments:
Post a Comment