5 AM Phone Calls

(image from: http://thetwors.blogspot.com/2011/04/sleeping-in-and-saving-environment.html)

I'm tired today.

Currently, I'm not feeling it.  Adrenaline and all that. You know how you get so tired you just can't help but function on overdrive?? That's how I feel at the moment.  But my need to overdrive is currently finished for the day - we're having family snuggle on the couch Sunday (except for Little Miss, who is mimicking Pete's skipping in the movie we're watching, Pete's Dragon.  So I'm sure the adrenaline will pass in a bit and I'll crash.....

The past few nights have not been good sleeping nights for me.  Which is honestly, really weird, because when I lay down at night, I fall asleep, and then I am OUT until Little Miss bombs me out of bed in the morning.  I would sleep until the afternoon every day if I could, I kid you not, and still be able to sleep at night. I LOVE sleeping. sigh 


Thursday night I realized how insanely busy Friday was going to be, rushing to fit everything in we needed to get done and get to my SIL's to surprise the nieces after school, so stayed up late crafting the birthday presents I wouldn't otherwise have had time to make.

Not ideal, but no BIG deal or anything.  I watched silly tv on Netflix and made oodles of earrings and necklaces for the 8-year-old dear to accessorize with now that she's got pieced ears.  It was fun!

But then Friday morning around 5 Little Miss decided she needed to come crash my sleep for some snuggles.

Fine, no big deal. I love snuggles.

Then Friday night we slept away from home, which again, I don't usually have a hard time with. When it's time for me to sleep, that is that!  I'm lucky that way, I guess.

But I stayed up a little bit late blogging about the epic fail and by the time I got to bed Mr. Man was definitely asleep.  And laying on his back.  Which for me, means a NOISY night.  MAN can he snore.

And then my nieces all wake up at like, I don't even know - some hour of the morning I've never seen before! hahaha So I didn't really sleep in yesterday either.

Okay, but LAST night.  Really.  UGH.

Mr. Man knew I was getting tired going a couple of days without ideal amounts of sleep - some people function just fine and dandy, but I'm one of these for whom a lost hour's sleep equals a disproportionately huge shift in mood, so it's usually in his best interest I'm well rested ;-) - and so insisted that we get to bed at a decent hour last night.  He made me go to bed BEFORE 11 even.  I mean, REALLY!!

But then I couldn't fall asleep!  WHAT??

I finally fell asleep sometime after 1 AM, after listening to his slow, NON-snore for EVER, and fighting the urge to get up and do ANYTHING other than lay there like a useless lump... if I'm awake I may as well be productive and DO something, right??

Anyway, I finally, eventually fell asleep.  Yay for me.

5 AM. FIVE IN THE MORNING.  Mr. Man's cell phone, out in the dining room, rings.  Mr. Man's cell phone.  Mr. Man's cell phone NEVER rings.  Not EVER.  I don't even call it.  He has this pay-as-you-go plan where texts are unlimited and phone calls are limited, so no one EVER calls him 'cause he won't answer it anyway!  hahaha Sometimes my brother forgets and calls Mr. Man's cell phone, but that's it. It NEVER rings.

It rang.  At five o'clock in the morning.

Did he hear it??

Gosh, no, of course not.

And so I lay there, having been aroused by someone ELSE'S cell phone probably having been accidentally drunk-dialed or something stupid at 5AM, with a wandering, wide-awake mind.

And then I thought, gee, you know, the only person who ever really calls Mr. Man's cell phone IS my brother.  I wonder if it was him calling.  I wonder if everything is okay.  I wonder if everyONE is okay.  I mean, why do people ever call other people at five o'clock in the morning?  Not ever for anything except to say that someone's died or something other such fabulous news.  I wonder who's DEAD?! Why didn't I run and grab the phone? Did Mom get in a plane crash coming home from Florida? Even though she's not flying home until Friday??

Wait. Wait a second. If someone's dead then whoever called will call again.  They won't call once and not get us.  When you call people at 5 in the morning you expect that they're asleep and you'll have to call again.  They'll call again.

...........

Then MY cell phone rang.

Ohmigoodness, someone IS dead!  WHO'S DEAD?!?!

I GRABBED my phone, looked at the caller ID to see: "unknown caller," and frantically pushed the button to answer the phone.

Except I pushed the wrong button.

I PUSHED THE WRONG BUTTON!!

I accidentally pushed the lower right button instead of the upper right button to answer my phone.  Now, I totally understand why I did it - my phone really doesn't ring very often either; as popular as I am people just don't call me (it's okay - I don't call anyone either. Phone chat isn't really my thing).  So I don't have oodles of practice on automatically pressing the 'answer' button. When my phone does ring I have to look at it and register which button is answer.  And in the pitch-black of 5:05 AM I hit the wrong button.

NO! NO NO NO NO NO!  Someone's DEAD and I just DIDN'T answer the phone!! OHMIGOODNESS!  PLEASE call back! Please call back!! I'm sorry! I know which button it is now! I know!  CALL ME BACK!!

I lept out of bed with my cell in my hand and raced to the living room to grab the portable off of the charger - we have a charger in the bedroom, too, and keep a phone in there for just such an occasion, but of course it's migrated to somewhere else in the house so was of now use to me this morning.

With my cell phone in one hand and the house phone in the other - obviously someone who wants to get us badly enough at 5 am to call both our cell phones will next try to rouse us with the landline, right?  Right?? - I headed back to my bedroom.  Where I proceeded to turn the ringers way down so as not to wake up Mr. Man before necessary when one of the phones inevitably rang again.   And then sat there.  One phone in each hand.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And imagined what the news was.  WHO called?  Maybe Mom was coming home early for something and the plane went down?  Maybe my dad's cold this week wasn't just a cold and he succumbed during the night??  WHO IS DEAD?!?!

And I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And WAITED.

Finally around 5:30 I put the phones down on my side table - if I heard Mr. Man's cell phone in the dining room I'd hear the land line from the other rooms and the turned-down ringer by my head.

And I lay down and waited.  Waited for the phone to ring. Waited to fall back to sleep.

Back to sleep. HA! HAHAHAHAHA!  As IF!

I was SO worked up.

No one ever called.  To the best of my knowledge all my family members are alive and well.   Mr. Man checked his phone when he got up and the only missed call was a 'blocked number,' whatever that means on his phone.

I don't know who it was, what was going on.  Was someone trying to get a hold of us to tell us something?  We were both pocket-dialed by someone, one after the other? Were we both wrong-numbered at 5 in the morning? That's happened to us before.

NO IDEA.

But, promise me something, please.

If you ever accidentally pocket-dial, wrong-number dial, or WHATEVER to someone at 5 in the morning and you don't talk to an actual person? LEAVE A MESSAGE and say  "SORRY! Wrong number!!" so that at 5:01 AM when the poor unsuspecting, used-to-be-sleeping-and-is-now-going-insane-with-worry soul can say "Oh. MORON!" and then go back to sleep!!

I'm going to go take a nap.